Yes, online dating does work, but like everything else there is a catch. There are millions of singles who have already joined online dating sites, so they are very popular and do work for some people. So, what’s the catch you ask? Finding that one special person for you takes time and effort. That’s the catch.

 

You have to write a great profile and post a picture. The important thing here is to be honest. Being funny and original will make your profile stand out among thousands. The picture needs to be as flattering as possible, but it needs to reflect the real you. All of these things take more time.

 

Each contact needs to be different and special. You need to make reference to their profiles and not just drool over their picture. You will need to answer emails that you receive and do so promptly, but not too promptly. All this takes time.

 

Dating web sites are about basic human interaction and friendship as well as dating. More is required than just putting a profile up to find your soul mate or lifelong partner. On a dating site you are interacting with other people.

 

You should think of dating sites as friendship web sites. You will be interacting with many people and maybe dating a few. Some people could be on the web site for online social interaction and not really seeking a serious relationship.

 

You have to be very careful when browsing profiles because some may be fake. If they seem so happy, full of life, and have such good profile pictures caution is advised. Unfortunately, there are lonely people who try to play games on other lonely people. Remember, you are not lonely or desperate, just alone, so be suspicious.

 

The best online dating websites allow members to interact with each other in all kinds of different ways. They may allow chat, so you can safely communicate with someone you just met online and not have to pay extra to do so.

 

A word to the wise, patience is the key when using dating web sites. They are a useful tool, but some profiles and pictures could be made up. When you make the first move by contacting prospects by email, you can not just use a form email. You don’t just throw one line in the water and expect a miracle. It is not that easy.

 

Prepare yourself for the reality that you may never find a serious relationship on a dating website. You may go on a date, but rarely have a second date with someone. It will be even rarer to go out with someone for more than a few weeks.

 

Dating sites give a lot of people power over others they normally would not have.  They can see your profile, picture, and make correct assumptions about you without even meeting. Not everyone online wants a lasting relationship and maybe all they want to do is date different people, but that is something few people will ever admit.

 

If you are ready for the challenges of online dating, here are some recommended web sites:

 

Friendfinder

Matchmaker

Lavalife

SinglesNet

Chemistry

Match

eHarmony

 

 

How will your friends and family remember you when you are gone… after you die?  Will they remember the things you did well or will they reminisce about your quirks and shortcomings?  Are they being disrespectful to only think about your flaws?  Maybe they remember your weaknesses because they enjoyed being in your company in spite of your flaws.

 

Friends and family can admire our different skills, abilities, and strengths, but oftentimes its is hard to relate to us on those things.  The knowledge and experience we have in an area might be much greater than theirs and they can not fully comprehend your world.  Our friends and family may never see us when we are our working environment and just know us when we are at home, relaxing, or otherwise away from work. 

 

People can relate more easily to us through our flaws because we all have the same human struggles of daily living.  Some of us do better than others in managing ourselves and our environment. Our imperfections will be most remembered in the emotions of those we leave behind when we are gone forever.

 

We may have character traits which others may think of as weaknesses such as being shy or disorganized, stuttering or having certain phobias.  These make us unique in the eyes of others and they can more fully appreciate our strengths when they know our weaknesses. The beauty of our imperfections can only be appreciated by the people who really love us dearly.

 

I can not help but reminisce about my close friend, Glenn, who died at the age of 45 with a rare cancer.  He grew up with his very domineering father and two sisters after his parents divorced at an early age.  Glenn stuttered some especially when nervous.  Because he never had a mother at home, he spent his life looking for love in all the wrong places.  He was intelligent and physically very strong, but  had a generous spirit so that people would often take advantage of him.  Glenn had his faults, but I miss him as a friend very much.

 

Below is a Good Will Hunting style video of a widow memorializing her husband at his funeral. She begins by talking about her husband’s crude habits which shocks the funeral guests and then ends talking about beautiful imperfections.

 

Craigslist is a really great service, but it is often abused and misused. Happily, I have sold small household items at a reasonable price on craigslist that would not be worth the cost of purchasing a classified newspaper ad, but one area of craigslist that is being abused is the jobs section. Companies and individuals are seeking to hire skilled workers for low wages, often in the minimum wage range or less. They are actively seeking people that they can exploit freely. Then they act like they are doing a public service by giving a person an opportunity!

 

Due to the economic downturn that our nation and world are experiencing, the exploitation of employees has accelerated. Well that’s the excuse employers and managers currently use, but some of them are of such low morals, they would exploit employees in a good economy. All I can say is that practically everyone on craigslist wants to hire a student, intern, or someone willing to work for cheap. They even go so far as to specify a starving student or artist. Sometimes they want you to work for nothing – period – or for some really insulting amount – below minimum wage or for beer! 

 

After responding to a job opportunity on craigslist and being hired, I was being exploited from day 1 without realizing it.  During the hiring interview, I was told my starting pay would be a “training pay rate” and after 90 days my pay would be increased to a new higher rate. Well, after 90 days, the manager refused to increase my pay and for many of my co-workers. She denied that the interviewer promised a pay increase and during the hiring process the employer had me sign documents basically saying they could do whatever they pleased in regard to employee terminations and pay increases. So I quit.

 

Now that having an Internet presence is becoming more and more important each day, many web designers are asked, “show us how you made it so we can do it on our own “in-house” from now on.” Yet few of those people want to contract web designers to show them how to do design. Or “I don’t want you to work for free”, but the client doesn’t want to pay for it either. Many potential clients approach asking for a “free test” or “say that guy charged us this much, so you should charge us less too.” Each web designer is a professional with their own rates and they are usually willing to negotiate within reason, but they often meet potential clients who want things for as cheap as possible… if not for free!

 

Negotiating the price before making a large purchase or contacting someone’s service is wise. Trying to re-negotiate after the work is completed is not an acceptable negotiating tactic, its haggling.  If negotiating is done before work commences, great. When a client places an order and it is accepted, the client is obligated to pay the fair market value set by the businessman at the time of the order. No respectable hardworking businessman should be asked to give a discount after completing the work.

 

Giving discounts after completing the work is enabling bad behavior and encouraging lack of planning. It boils down to being consistent. Have a set policy on pricing, terms, agreements, and never deliver the finished product without payment while ensuring you get some up front payment to guarantee the client is serious about finishing. Do not work without a legally binding contract, do not waiver from that contract, be fair and reasonable. If a client refuses to sign a contract, you do not want to do business with them anyway.

 

Don’t be a  craigslist cheapskate when paying.  Negotiation beforehand is acceptable, but “a lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part” for the businessman or contractor.  Clients should remember the rule of two-out-of-three: when you negotiate you can only get two out of three things in regard to quality, price, and time. You can never get something done as quickly as you want, with the best quality, and at a low cost. Many businessmen and contractors should consider adding an ACS line on their bill. A 10-12% surcharge of the total and the only thing negotiable: The Annoying Client Surcharge.